H1N1 Is No Joke...

Sorry for my lack of blogs.....but i had to lay low for the FBI was trying to trace my whereabouts because of this underground porno industry I am currently running....Anyways thats the least of my worries now that I'm here...

Since my last blog I have been a few places to throw the police off....I went to st louis to check on my father in the hospital before he had bypass surgery which he recovered from.....also i had to get a crave case from white castle....i havent had one in ages....My girlfriend was being a bitch the whole time up there and the whole time back... i think she is in on it with the FBI....they must be bribing her with money or blackmailing her....but next time i feel the feds on my coat tail I'm going to drop her like a bad habit....let this bitch know i don't play no games....

I went to the football game here because i knew there would be too many people for them to single me out and it was halloween so i dressed like John Madden knowing the would never think anything of it.....the game was terrible to watch and painful to bear....they barely won....but i nearly lost when I pissed on an agent's shoe in the rest room while he was taking a number 2.....i sprinted out before he could gather his belongings up other wise i would have been done for.....hopefully they dont DNA test my urine and confirm my location in Warrensburg....

So i had to break for st. louis again....things had to have cooled off since the last time i was there...so i went to Mckendree College in Illinois and played this sorry ass team by the name of UT-Martin.....they were D1 but I can't even take pride in beating them they were that bad....she won prolly by like 10 or so but it should have been by 25....Another reason we played so horribly is because of this ref.....i have reason to believe it is the same one i pissed on....thats right....the agent...he was on to me for sure....he called every foul on me and every time he did he glared at me with those green eyes.....i could read his mind....he had agents surrounding the building so by the time the game was over i would be arrested.....So at halftime i didn't return to the court....i hid in the dumpster until they had to take the trash out....lucky for me it was 15 minutes after i had hoped in and dug my way to the bottom....they proceeded to take me out and dump me...when they did this is when i made my break....all the agents were focused on every exit of the building to even be paying attention to anything else....so once i got away from the grounds i called one of my actors and she came and got me in her chopper and took me back to the burg.....

Then monday came where i had to hide my real identity as a porno director and disguise myself as a 21 year old student once again....i had practice and we had to get the H1N1 vaccine and now I am quarantined in the seharah desert due to my body getting sick from the vaccine....i must not infect my team with this sickness....i will write to you all and update you on my condition soon enough....but until then but my movies.....help me make some cash so i can have that to flee from the FBI.....I'm counting on you.....with out you i will die here in the desert.....please save me!

5 Hour Energy My Ass........

DO NOT and I repeat DO NOT take a five hour energy......if and only if you know what is good for you.....I took one before practice because I was a wee bit down in the dumps, if you will. Practice was going good I was running well and never really got tired at all....I was shooting well and everything.....everything was going as planned and i was well on my way to getting hooked on this drug they call 5 hour energy.....overall as a team we had a shitty practice so coach just made us run...after my second 10 in 1......i could not breathe and had to keep taking short little gasps of air.....it felt like a knife was in my lung and my heart was about to explode at any minute.....i quickly informed my trainer...curls....and he was not pleased with me....he said that when braylon edwards advertises this product he is only lying to get paid.....hence why he leads the league in dropped passes.....then it all made sense and the blurred vision started to go away and I saw the sign.....energy drinks do not work.....unless alcohol is in them.....or something like that.....luckily i caught my breath 10 minutes or so later otherwise you would be reading this blog now would ya? thats what i thought.......

So i'm supposing you want to hear about my day.....well i was awaken at 7 am by my sister telling me my dad has had his second heart attack.....DON'T GASP AT MY STORY.......we havent talked in about 4 years.....needless to say im going to see him tomorow in the hospital and that is that....they say he might not make it so we will just see......sorry if i seem heartless.....you just dont the whole story......

As i predicted the the celtics and lakers were victorious last night.....the spurs will win tonight.....and i like pineapple....ALOT

omg i almost forgot.....i tried to blog today while in class but apparently it did not work....damn jewish phone....but i was sitting outside class attending to a phone call when a man around the age of 30 started to sprint very slowly toward me....i noticed both hands were behind his back while running....once he passed me both his hands were covering his bung hole.....almost to infer that if they werent that he would be spewing poo out of it.......ps he was weaaring a terrible coffee colored suit.....ew....also in that class only 12 peopple out of 52 showed up ba ha ha ha how hard is it to get up and go to a 10 am class.....for 50 minutes....c'mon....

Finished blades of glory today.....first time i have ever seen it......there are some pretty priceless quotes in it....

Lastly......Im not happy with my teammates for our costumes are not coming along at all....we dont have shit....bastards


"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." -Coach Darrel Royal

Honestly?

1. Southwest Baptist (7) -- 97 pts.??????????????????????????????????
2. Central Missouri (4) -- 92 pts.
3. Emporia State -- 76 pts.
4. Fort Hays State -- 71 pts.
5. Missouri Western -- 59 pts.
6. Nebraska-Omaha -- 54 pts.7.
Missouri Southern -- 53 pts.
8. Washburn -- 39 pts.
9. Pittsburg State -- 28 pts.
10. Northwest Missouri -- 23 pts.
11. Truman -- 13 pts.

Okay so what the hell is going on that I just seem to be missing the point of? For 3 years now SBU has been preseason ranked number one and we follow at number 2....Every year we beat them....last year we beat them by 35 to go to the elite eight and yet we are still in second? Honestly this lack of respect from the conference just pisses me off and frankly has ruined my day.

Other than that I think Matt, Dusty, Bryce, And myself have figured out our halloween costumes for this weekend....We will be going as the golden girls ha ha ha....we originally went to the salvation army with the idea of becoming the news team from anchorman.....when it was time to check out we decided it was already done too much and we stuck with the golden girls....I am Rose....Dusty is Blanch....Bryce is Sophia... and Matt (by default) is Dorothy....ha ha ha ha.....

Tonight the NBA season tips off......I got the celtics over the cavs regardless of Shaq's pressence this season.....Also I got the Lakers over The Clippers......Kobe will get his but Blake Griffin is a Man-Child....

Also tonight is our weekly fling known as twister tuesday....usually alcohol is involved but not so much tonight since we play U-T Martin on sunday.....we invite the basketball team over and then unlimited amount of females and play the game twister.....its fun lol.....we try to make the positions as sexual as possible and of course we keep score...I usually win....no joke...

Overall this tuesday was great....class was cancelled....went to the salvation army.....oh and we didnt have practice today which is always amazing.....twister tuesday should be fun tonight tho

" I never expect to lose. Even when I'm the underdog, I still prepare a victory speech."
H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

ALAS!

So today just so happens to be the day I join the mainstream of America and start my very first blog. Ha Ha! A few teammates and I have decided to give this whole thing a try and see how it goes...

A few things you must know about me:

I play basketball at the University of Central Missouri located in Warrensburg, MO...
I attended High School at Ozark High...Just south of Springfield, MO...
I'm pretty laid back and chill so if your looking for a serious blog this isn't where to find it...
This will be somewhat comical and somewhat serious, It just depends on my mood...
I love Mexican culture, one day I will take all my saved money and runaway there never to return...
My roommate Bryce and I love to scare the shit out of our other roommate Matt everyday...
Matt is 6'10 and looks like David Hasslehoff (That should make the last sentence funnier)...
I have a girlfriend who I love dearly, her name is Shelby...
I am 21 years old...
Also, I like long walks on the beach...'Nuff Said

Here are all the essentials you need not only to understand my blog but myself.....Enjoy!

"The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it." Anonymous